Everybody Loves Raymond
by Amelia Bright
Summary: Peter, Egon, and Winston all have feelings for the same very special person in their lives.


Though he would never admit it to them, Winston is slightly in awe of his fellow Ghostbusters. Well, there's really nothing particularly awe-inspiring about Venkman, but Ray and Egon are a bit unbelievable. The two mad scientists are as strange as they are brilliant. Egon, with his stoicness and slightly perverse sense of humor, seems to have come right out of a cartoon. Then there's Ray. He's unnaturally nice, freakishly friendly. Winston has come to appreciate it, but there are still times that Ray surprises him.

Ray is currently sitting to the left of him, tinkering over one of the proton packs. Winston has been watching Ray's hands, fascinated by their dexterity. Now he looks up at Ray's face. Stantz isn't smoking at the moment; open flames aren't exactly safe near the inner workings of the equipment. Instead, Ray's teeth sink into his plump bottom lip while he's concentrating. Winston strangely finds himself unable to look away. Ray's lips look really soft, and Winston has never considered himself exclusively straight. He reaches forward and brushes his fingers against Ray's cheek. Ray looks at him now, mismatched eyes wide, and Winston curls his hand around Ray's jaw and leans forward, presses a kiss upon those pretty lips.

When it breaks, Ray is blushing and he sputters in an attempt to speak. Winston smiles and waits patiently for Ray to get his bearings.

Finally, the engineer manages to squeak out, "Why'd you kiss me?"

"You're too nice to make the first move," Winston replies, grinning. "Hope your girlfriend doesn't get mad."

"I don't have a girlfriend, Zedd. You know that." Ray is smiling now too. His eyes are sparkling, and he leans forward conspiratorially. "I'm not really into girls anyway."

Winston laughs heartily. "I had my suspicions. So, are you okay that I kissed you? You like me too?"

Ray's face softens. "Yeah, I do. You're handsome."

Winston kisses him again, this time on the tip of his nose. "Take me to dinner? Tomorrow night?"

Still blushing bright pink, Ray nods. "I'd love to."

* * *

Peter is having sex with Dana. When he comes, it's not her name he moans out.

"R-raaaay."

"Excuse me?" Dana is glaring up at him.

"Um, Daaaayy-na?"

"Don't play that game, Peter."

He sighs and pulls out, rolls over so he's flat on his back next to her. Another heavy sigh. "Don't make me talk about it."

Dana seems to recognize the defeated tone in his voice, and her demeanor softens. "I've known you long enough to know that means we definitely need to talk about it. Talk to me. I won't be angry."

Peter is surprisingly (even to himself) willing to open up to her. "It's just, ever since the whole thing with Vigo, I've been seeing Ray differently. Like, you know, I've always been pretty flexible in my sexuality, and from an objective standpoint, I've always found Ray nice to look at. But after that fight, when he got possessed by Vigo and I- we almost lost him, Dana. And it made me realize that… I love him."

"Why haven't you told him?"

"Well, because I love _you_. And, uh… because of Egon. Egon's been in love with Ray since college. _Since college_. He's only comfortable with dropping hints, the moron. Won't say it to his face. Spengler may have a big brain, but it's encased in one helluva thick skull. Besides, I really don't want to break up with you. I just…"

"Wish you could have both?" Dana suggests.

Peter laughs, and it's an empty sound. "Yeah, pretty much. You think I'm gross, don't you?" He gets out of bed, pulls his boxers up from around his ankles.

"No, Peter."

"No what? No, you don't want me to go?"

Dana giggles. "That too, but what I meant was no, I don't think you're gross. You know, I've seen you guys interact, and I think Ray might have a little crush on you as well. And if Egon is too dense to be forthright with him, maybe he doesn't deserve Ray."

The furrow between Peter's eyebrows has gotten thicker and thicker as she talks. "Maybe I'm misunderstanding you here, but it sure sounds like you're encouraging me to go for it."

"Good, since that is my intention."

Peter's face shifts expressions fast enough to give himself whiplash. "You're breaking up with me, then?"

"No. Listen, Peter, you and the guys have a really special bond. I don't think I exactly get it, but I do think it would be wrong to make you choose between them and me. Honestly, if there's any of the three of them I'm okay to share you with, it's Ray."

"Wow. That's a lot to take in. Okay, but listen, I still feel bad doing this to Spengs. I really should talk to him first. Let him know I'm gonna stake a claim on Ray if he doesn't. I want to give him a chance to make his move first."

Dana smiles. "You're a better man than most give you credit for, Peter Venkman."

* * *

Peter and Egon meet the next evening. Ray, the only Ghostbuster who still makes his home in the firehouse, is thankfully out. So is Winston. _He must have already gone home_ , Peter figures.

"What did you want to discuss, Peter?" Egon asks, not lifting his eyes from the notes he is writing.

"Doctor Stantz."

This makes Egon take notice. "You want to talk about Ray? He doesn't seem to have any problems. He's been in quite a good mood lately, in fact."

"Yeah, yeah, he has. I'm glad. It makes me happy when Ray's happy."

Egon's lips twitch; it's nearly a smile. "Ray's presence lifts my spirits as well."

"That's actually what I wanted to talk about, Spengs. I know how you feel about Ray. And, well, I feel the same way."

Egon blinks. "You're harboring romantic feelings for Ray too? For how long, Peter?"

"A couple of months. That's why I brought it up. I'm gonna go for it, unless you go for it first. I'm giving you a week, and if you don't tell Ray how you feel by the end of it, I will. We got a deal, Spengler?"

Egon opens his mouth to reply, but the door opens. He and Peter both look up, and they see Ray and Winston come through the entrance. They're holding hands. Egon looks to Peter, expecting him to speak, but the man is laughing with his hands over his mouth.

"Hello. Where have you been?" Egon asks.

Ray smiles, nods to Winston, who says, "On a date."

Peter is laughing harder now, spit flying from his lips.

"What's wrong with him?" Ray asks.

"Well-" Egon begins, but Peter cuts him off, waving his hand in front of Egon's face.

"Spengler and I were just talking about you. About asking you out. We weren't expecting Zeddemore to beat us to it," he shakes his head, "Of all people."

Ray's eyes go wide. "Wow, really? Which one of you wanted to ask me out?"

"I did," Egon and Peter say simultaneously.

Ray is blushing now, his chubby cheeks fire engine red. "Both of you?" he squeaks, "I-I would love to."

All three other Ghostbusters stare at him in shock. Peter is the first to recover. "Um, Ray, that's not exactly what we meant…"

"Ray…" Winston begins, looking sad. He tries to let go of his date's hand, but Ray squeezes it tighter.

"No, Winston, don't. Guys, I love you. All of you, so much. And, well, I don't understand why a relationship has to be a one-on-one thing, you know? I mean, you get it, Venkie. I highly doubt you were intending to break up with Dana."

Peter looks down at his feet. "Guilty as charged," he stammers out.

"So what you're saying is… you'd like to date… all of us?" Egon asks.

Ray's huge grin says it all, but he still speaks, "Yeah, I would really like that. I get it if you guys aren't comfortable with it, and if that's the case, Winston did ask me first, so…"

Winston lays his head on Ray's shoulder. "Thanks, sweetheart," he mutters teasingly.

"I've heard of relationships like that before. Polyamory is the term, I believe," Egon says, "I would be willing to try."

If Ray were to smile any wider, his mouth would split like the Joker's. "Yeah, yeah, that's it! Winston's in, Egon's in… Peter, are you in?"

Peter grabs Ray's face and plants a big sloppy kiss on his lips.


End file.
